Monday, January 11, 2010


I drove to my home town Saturday. I need to clear my head.

I go to the coffee shop I like best and play the piano while my tea cools. Then I walk up to canon ball park and drink my tea sitting on the hill, over looking the Boulevard. It's pretty cold out. I decide to call Maria.

She is actually home, I thought she would be working. She tells me to come over but take my time, she is feeling lazy. When I get there she is in the top bunk of her sister's bed watching MTV. She tells me she just stopped going to work like two weeks ago. She puts on socks over her tights and we go out to her garage. I look at her paintings she is working on, her new desk. She turns on a record. We smoke out of a broken pipe because her boyfriend has her regular one. I almost burn my nose. We decide to go to Goodwill (thrift shop). I am feeling really silly and laugh a lot.

When we get there random people show up. It is like the whole gang. Joe is there, Dickaless and Sadie. We agree to meet up later. I am fascinated by a rubix cube I found. I am cold so I buy a weird dress jacket that is blue plaid. Maria and I go to the Mexican restaurant. I eat half of my food and can't finish it. We look up and it looks like porn on TV, but it is the watchman. Dickaless and Sadie show up. They want to drink. We go out.

We stop to smoke some more pot by the train tracks. When we sit down we start talking and we talk about pine trees. I explain how they bring water through themselves, and how they gather water from the fog we have. Which is why the tallest trees in the world are here. But I am high and going all into detail and talking about the water molecules slightly sticking together like pearls on a string and how the sun pulls them out, and in pulling one pulls all the others up - carrying them through the body of the tree. I go on about the whole tree thing for a while. Maria says, "Trees freak me out, man"

I take out my journal and start writing because I think this is all very amusing. Maria wants more people to hang out. She looks at Dickaless and asks "Do we have any other friends?"
"You guys are my friends, I don't have any others." he says.
Sadie agrees.
Maria looks at the ground. "I don't have any friends." after a few moments she quickly adds "except for you guys."
Sadie talks while I write.
Dickaless is sitting on his bike and he turns to me, saying "Dear diary, I'm having so much fun with my new friends!"
We all laugh. He asks if that's what I'm writing. "It is now."
We talk about subconscious dreams. Dickaless wants to remember his. I did stuff to remember my dreams once, and it worked. And I didn't like it so I did stuff to forget. Subconscious dreams freak me out.

We walk to sevey and are outside when all these random people keep showing up. A guy Maria slept with shows up but then leaves. This dickhead that is sometimes cool shows up, his name is K.C. Another guy shows up, cute with glasses. I know him from many times before but I can't remember his name. Chris? Something or other he is buying chaser and says he will come drink with us but doesn't. I get them thirty twos of natty ice. I get one for myself as well. and milk duds. We walk to a nearby school to drink. K.C. suggests I have us a party at my house sometime. I didn't think anyone would come all the way to my place. The thought that they would - This makes me happy.

It all feels so natural, like the old times but better. I feel like I am more accepted as part of the group, like I'm not Maria's friend but their friend. And Maria and I are getting along. We all smoke some more. Joe shows up again. I give away most of my beer, I have to drive later. Maria and I walk back to her house, getting her pipe from her boyfriend on the way. I draw her and listen to the well tempered clavier she has on vinyl. So bomb. It is super foggy when I leave and I am frightened the whole time I am driving home. When I get home I talk on-line to Andon's best friend again. I also decide to have that party and I announce it on facebook. Sleep. It is for the weak. I give in around 3am and have weird dreams that I didn't want to remember.

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